Tuesday, December 31, 2013

.A late-night message.

Walk the talk
easy to say but hard to do
I might say lots of things
lots and lots of advices,
coz they are logical
coz they sound so mature
coz I read them in books, in magazines
and by saying them, I'm hoping I could be the one I'm not.

No, no
I was not crying
I was frustrated
and I was thinking why I sounded so logical, so matured, so intelligent?
am I trying to impress people?
am I pushing myself too hard?
am I really trying so hard to change my fate?

I don't know
I'm not sure
too many emotions involved
until I couldn't think rationally
I'm too selfish! I want to have what I'm longing to have
coz I'm afraid of losing once again

Shoot! It shouldn't be that way I know.
I'm daydreaming a lot
too many fairy tales in my head
watched too many Barbies and Enchanted.
Feels like slapping myself
and pinch my toes.
'Wake up! It's 2014!and for the thousandth time, fairy tales don't exist!'

p/s: happy new year. be happy. no matter what.

Saturday, December 28, 2013

get sweat!

I hit the court today. Badminton!! After almost 2 years I didn't hold the racquet, well, today I did. *Smile

I was so excited that I ironed my jersey the day before.  Lolol, excited much? The next day, sister was surprised to see me.  'Tema apa hari ni? Majulah sukan untuk Negara?' Haha. She's always like that.  Whenever I go out, she will give a theme to my outfit.

It was my first time in the stadium.  I had no idea where the badminton court is.  But, I walked like I've been there before. =='
Then I saw a guy whom I reckoned was going to play badminton too.  So, I walked behind him.  When he realised that I was being a spooky stalker, he asked,

'Buat apa sini?'
'Sini stor. Sana court'.
Ouh shoot malu. So I changed my direction.

'Sana arah toilet la cik. Masuk pintu kanan tu.'


Anyway, we played for an hour (non stop).  Azlan won the match.  Twice.  As expected.  Though two of us played against him energetically, but he still won. Sobs. May be coz we talk a lot kot while playing and not to mention the thousands of 'ooooh' 'aaaah' 'arghhh' 'eeeeee'. So, all the energy being channelled to the mouth, not to the hands and feet.  Sobs.


 p/s: Balik rumah terus demam. Majulah sukan untuk negaralah sangat.

Wednesday, December 25, 2013


Dalam kereta. Lampu merah atas jalan.  Kereta berhenti.  Tiba-tiba muncul kereta dari arah belakang memotong dengan laju dan langgar lampu merah.  Hebat!:

'Ish. Kurang asam betul! @#$%^^&*&$%!'
'Sabar.  Mungkin bini dia mau bersalin.'
'Mana ada perempuan dalam kereta tu.'
'Mungkin dia mau pergi hospital.'
'Hospital arah sana. Bukan sini!'
'Dia ada emergency tu.'
'Emergency apanya sampai potong orang langgar lampu merah! Rude!'
'Anak dia kemalangan ka. Kan? Kita tak tahu.'


Dalam kereta.  Pasang signal ke kanan.  Sangat pasti tidak ada kenderaan dari arah belakang sebelah kanan.  Muncul motorsikal secara tiba-tiba.  Ditunggang dengan laju dan bahaya:

'Bawak girlfriend! Patutlah laju. Mau tunjuk macho la tu. Huh!'
'Dia bawa lelaki rambut panjang mungkin.'
'Mustahil!Pegang pinggang lelaki tu kuat-kuat macam tak mahu lepas.  Lelaki mana ada buat macam tu. Unless dia gay.'
'Mungkin isteri dia.'
'No no. Isteri tak kan pegang kuat-kuat macam tu.'
'Kenapa pula?'


Tunggu orang.

'Dia tak sampai-sampai lagi'
'Jalan jam mungkin.'
'Kalau dah tau jalan jam, geraklah awal.Ish.'
'Dia urus bini dia baru bersalin mungkin.'
'Tak apa lah.  Kejap lagi mungkin dia sampai.'
'Kalau pun lambat, bagi tahu lah awal-awal!'
'Mungkin dia habis kredit'


Tunggu phone call.

'Dia tak telefon-telefon lagi.'
'Dia sibuk kot.'
'Tak. Mustahil. Selalu dia free ja.'
'Dia tak ada kredit mungkin.'
'Aku telefon pun dia tak angkat.'
'Dia tertinggal phone?'
'Takkan lah tertinggal phone sampai satu hari!'
'Dia tak sedar tu telefon bunyi. Silent mode.'
'Tak.Tak. Dia memang sengaja.  Dia tak mahu cakap dengan aku. Dia memang sengaja!'
'Dia penat tu. Banyak kerja.'
(1 message received)- "Sorry. Kredit habis. Handphone silent.  Busy buat research."


p/s: Be positive and make excuses for every unfortunate things that happened. (Most days, words speak louder than action.ehe.)

Friday, December 20, 2013


'Hati-hati di luar Negara.  Diorang tak tau adat.  Pickpockets! Hati-hati. Pegang handbag rapat-rapat.  Diorang racist tau. Tudung jangan tanggal.  Diorang tak berbudi bahasa, tak macam orang Malaysia.  Hati-hati.  Nanti diorang bagi makanan tak halal.  Jangan ambil.  Hati-hati.  Orang putih ada pisau, senapang, nanti diorang tembak mati.  Hati-hati'

-Some of the many advices before I went to uk 3 years ago.

Ironically, the advices are more applicable in Malaysia.  The ministers always say 'Malaysia masih aman'.  I don't know if I am stupid or what, but somehow I don't understand the meaning of 'aman'.  What do they mean by 'aman' anyway?  Almost everyday the news reported about crime, murder, rape, accident, suicidal and all sorts of violence.  Are those defined how 'aman' our country is?   

Today, a taxi driver told me a recent incident that happened to his friend.  That night, his friend was on his way home when suddenly a 4-5 year old boy was in the middle of the road, stopping his taxi.  So, he stopped and asked the boy to move.  But the boy cried and asked for a lift home.  This concerned taxi driver was kind enough to give him a lift.  When the boy was about to get into the passenger seat, suddenly three strangers (all boys) with a knife get into the taxi.  Their knife was pressed against the taxi driver's neck and ordered him to quickly drive to the bank.  There, they threatened to kill him if he didn't withdraw all his money.  Thinking that life is more valuable than money, this man gave up the latter.  But still, he had to be hospitalised due to serious injury on his neck. Poor pakcik.

People are becoming crueller and meaner I suppose.  We do want to help those in need.  But, somehow it's hard to trust people nowadays.  Those gangsters are smart.  They take children and women for granted.  They used them like a toy to get what they want. The innocence really want to help, but they become victims eventually.  So who's to blame?  The gangsters??

No!  They do that because they want to live.  They don't have enough money to live.  Everything has prices.  Even dirty toilets! 30-50 cents! All the prices go up, but the wages still the same.  Corruption is everywhere. Not only among the ministers, even among those little tiny civil servants as well.  Why do they do that?  Coz they want to live.  Survival skills. Perhaps.  More corruption, more money in their pockets, and less money for the people. 

Don't you think, we are like ikan bilis surrounded by big whales in a small aquarium, trying to stay in the water and fighting for air?  Will we survive??  Hard to tell.  The whales will conquer every single little tiny space in the aquarium and if they hungry, they might as well eat us.  End of story.   

Eyes on the mat sallehs.  Mana tau dorang ada bawak pisau/m16.ehe.

By the way,
2014, goodluck!

Thursday, December 19, 2013

.because we are women. (part 3)

Women can be the most gentle human on earth.  But mind you, they can be a monster sometimes. 

But, you have to understand, every once in a blue moon month, the women are emotionally unstable.
They will get upset over every.single.thing.  Annoyed for no reason.  And can be annoying too.

When this moment comes, your jokes are no longer funny.  Even the funniest jokes sound so lame.  So when she says something, then you try to make jokes out of it, dielah. 

Sometimes she feels so useless. Like no one loves her. Not even her parents, or her family, or her friends.  She feels like  she's being deserted by everybody. 

Then, she starts calling her loved ones, you know, just checking; to make sure that she's being loved.  But, when they didn't pick up the phone, she starts to imagine things. Negative ones. And mind you, the voicemail will be the most annoying voice in the entire world.

TV series. Yes, they can be toooo emotional watching tv.  In their minds, they will take the role as the heroin.  Even watching cartoons can bring tears. Haish.

Some women, they just cry, for no reason.  Keep on weeping for hours, then when being asked 'why?' they don't even know why. 

And, don't you dare to comment on how much they eat.  Coz they won't eat that much when they are stable.

*This may not applicable to all women. 

*Source: Kak Mun's fb

To all women, perhaps we can keep this hadith in mind:

Abu Hurairah radiyallahu anhu reported that a man said to the Prophet S.A.W.:

"Advise me!" The Prophet said, 'Do not become angry and furious."  The man asked (the same) again and again, and the Prophet said in each case, "Do not become angry and furious."

(Al Bukhari; Vol. 8 No. 137)


because we are women (part 1)
because we are women (part 2)

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Interview?? What's that? Food?

Ok. Just straight to the point.

Interview was at 10 am.  Dib and I came at 9.59.  Punctual enough? Thank you. Why did we come on time, but not in time? Coz we know, there's something wrong with Malaysian time.  If somebody said 'Jumpa pukul 10 ya'.  Well, it means 'jumpa pukul 10.30'.  

Ouh, it turns out worst.  The six of us being ushered into the interview room at 1.40 pm.  (Nampak tak permainannya disitu?).  Almost 4 hours of waiting! Hey, hey I'm not complaining. Coz one of my friends had to wait for 6 hours.

Then, 2 hours in the interview room. Got 3 sessions instead of 2. The questions were tough.  When the interviewer mentioned about a best seller book, seriously, I can't help myself from thinking of Sophie Kinsella's.  Thank God, I didn't blurt out my answer.  Coz if I did, I will embarrass my entire generation (hyperbole). The answer to his question is 'Blue Ocean Strategies'.  I was like 'blue what??'  Urghhh.

Next killer question was 'Rama, anda seorang wanita. Jadi siapa menteri pembangunan wanita dan keluarga yang baru dilantik?'  Honestly, I just saw her name on tv3 yesterday.  But, I can't remember.  Blame me for being forgetful.  Eating tooo many ants perhaps.  I just remember the initial 'R'. So I confidently answered  Datuk Ramlah. He laughed! Urghhh again! Who on earth is Ramlah, Rama?? Who? Face palm.

Next, full name of Menteri Belia dan sukan. Ouh, 'Khairy Jamaluddin' my friend said.  Then the interviewer asked about his father's name.  Tell me people, what's the name of his father?  Cheers if you know it.  Coz I absolutely.had.no.idea.

After 2 hours, I felt like vomiting. My brain was too congested.  Before this, I never had the guts to read about GTP, GST, ETP, NKRA, NKEA, PPPM, TEKUN, TUKAR, LINUS, KSSM, KSSR, HJSK,SKDI,JRNFR,JRFNLDSLDOIDDSLI, DJDJDO (ouh pardon me. Too many acronyms.  I dunno which is which).  Thanks to SPP (eh another acronym.lol)

Smiles can be deceiving. Yes. Only Ben gave the real emotion.

Friday, December 6, 2013

.oh love.

'Love? What is love?'

'Love is when you still miss each other even when you are together.'

-The Great Doctor-  

Yes. It's a Korean drama. And yes, I'm sooo into this drama lately.  Blame my sister for dragging me to watch this series. (psst..channel 395 on weekdays 6.30-7.40 pm...In case you want to know.hihu)

'What is love?'

'Love is you.' =)

Manis. Manis macam gula kapas letak gula letak madu letak kicap manis abc (baca dengan satu nafas).

manis macam pegang tangan tengah-tengah bandar dengan sahabat.macam gambar ni.oh, good old days.

Monday, December 2, 2013

.orang hebat.

Teringat ketika menaiki teksi dari hotel ke KLIA. Pak Cik teksi baik.  Dia banyak cerita pasal pemandangan kirikanan (walaupun saya kurang sopan kadang-kadang menguap sebab tak cukup tidur.)

"Putrajaya ni cantikkan?'


'Dulu semua hal pentadbiran buat di KL. Sekarang ni semua tertumpu di Putrajaya. Ramai orang suka.'

'Kenapa pakcik?'

'Sebab dapat kurangkan kesibukan di bandaraya.  Taklah jem sangat kalau nak pegi kerja.  Ada yang nak pegi KL, ada yang nak pegi putrajaya.  Jadi jalan tak sesak sangat.'


'Mahathir ni pandai.  Dulu pakcik ingat lagi, ramai yang tak setuju dia buat pusat pentadbiran di Putrajaya.  Tapi sebab dia degil, dia tak peduli semua orang. Dia buat juga.  Bila da siap Putrajaya tu, semua senyap.'

'Dia memang hebat!'

Sekarang, Tun Dr. Mahathir letak jawatan sebagai penasihat PETRONAS. Dan jawatan itu akan diserahkan kepada Datuk Seri Najib.  Krikkrikkrik.

Friday, November 29, 2013

.teacher's diary. (teacher a.k.a babysitter)

I'm glad that parents nowadays really care about their children's education. They want them to learn as much as they could.  They want them to be educated, to be respected and most importantly to PASS the exams with flying colours A(s).  Perhaps that's why they send their children to tuition centres, no?

Tuition centre is fine for me.  But, some parents, they seem to forget that children are HUMANS too.  They are not ROBOTS.  Learning 3 to 4 hours straight?? Are you crazy??  Even a 30-minute lesson take them a hard work to focus, let alone a 3-hour lesson! Trust me, a 7 years old boy is seriously hard to handle.  If he gets tired, no matter how tempting your reward is, he won't bother.

Oh, there's another not-so-nice news I heard.  There are parents who send their children to tuition centre because they can't take care of them.  Just imagine, a parent send their 4 years old boy to a tuition centre pretending that their child needs an extra classes for a few subjects. Like what?  Your child had an important exam next year??

I dunno what the parents are thinking.  Perhaps I don't understand their feelings or thoughts because I'm not yet a mother.  Perhaps I dunno how hard it is to raise a kid.  But I hope someday, when I have my own kids, I won't torture their childhood.  I hope my partner will remind me of what I have written here.            

Sunday, November 24, 2013

.Tie The Knot: Black and White.

Nephew's wedding.

and more weddings to come next week. And the next next week. And the next next next week.

and I have no idea what to wear.

It seems like I have to wear the same baju twice. Or may be thrice.
So don't you ever come near me and say 'eh, bukan u dah pakai baju ni masa last week punya wedding ka?'

*Standing in front of the wardrobe, thinking what to wear next week. Eh, kita kena semangat pergi wedding ok. lol.

Friday, November 22, 2013

.rintik-rintik lebat.


'Oh samalah. Sini pun hujan.' (Sambil tangan tunjuk hati)

Pergh! Ini barulah! Telampau banyak tengok drama melayu ni.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

.robe and rama.

Congratulations mak!

Michael, you will be dearly missed again.

So many things happened during convo.  I will tell you everything later coz I have a task to submit on Sunday. So, good luck me!

Ok. now get back to work.

p/s: I feel terrible. If only you could read my mind. You will know the whole thing really.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

what DO u want?

Don't know what to expect
from this brand new feeling
and brand new self
May be giving too much hope is a very bad idea
May be I should just go with the flow.

So, which way is it? Right or left?
Oh, I forgot. My sense of direction is horrible.

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Sing.Or don't sing at all.

Pelamin Anganku Musnah

Ku Tunggu Jandamu

If I was your man


Anak Kampung

Rindu serindu rindunya

Bahagiamu derita ku.

Aku yang tersakiti (pfffft)


Do not...I repeat DO NOT let the singers sing these songs during your wedding.

Friday, November 1, 2013

.Marie Cheesecake Recipe.

There are times when you really feel like going to Secret Recipe to have a slice of cheesecake.  But thinking about it again, going to SR for the sake of cheesecake then go back home straight away is kinda too much.  So, that's the perfect time for your recipe books come in handy.

Marie biscuits (Chocolate)
200 gm cream cheese (Philadelphia)
125 gm butter (New Zealand Buttercup)
3-4 tablespoons sugar
Fullcream milk (Dutchlady)

Trust me! This cheesecake is verrrry easy to make! Even you, a handsome-macho-never-go-to-the-kitchen gentleman, can do it without having to wear an apron (eh).

How to do it?
1. Mix cream cheese, butter and sugar (use mixer).

2. Spread the mixture on your tray (as the first layer).

3. Dip biscuits in a bowl of milk for a second.  Arrange them on top of the first layer until the tray is reasonably covered.

4. Put another layer of the mixture on top of the biscuits. 

5. Repeat step 3-4 until it becomes like this:
You can choose to dust milo/cocoa powder as the topping (mine looks messy though) 

6. Once you've done it all, refrigerate your cheesecake for a few hours.

7. Tadaa...your marie cheesecake is now edible!
psst..fresh milk and cheesecake is not a good combination btw.

Selamat mencuba!

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

.semut hitam atas kayu hitam dalam pekat malam.

'Aku ikhlas bagi dengan kau ni'

'Mana kau tau kau ikhlas?'

'Aku tau lah. Hati aku.'

'Sejak bila ambil alih tugas Tuhan?'


'Orang ikhlas dia tak bagi tahu apa yang dia bagi tu ikhlas.'

'Kenapa pula?'

'Dalam surah al-ikhlas Allah ada mention word 'ikhlas'?'

'Er...surah al-ikhlas tu yang mana satu?' *dush

'Yang kulhualluahad tu.'

'Oh, yang selalu kita baca dalam solat tu.'

'Ha'ah.  Surah tu bagus baca dalam solat.'

'Setuju. Sebab surah tu pendek.'

*menangis.termakan cili.

Cari benda tersembunyi: SEMUT HITAM (kalau dapat cari sila claim hadiah.ehe)

Thursday, October 10, 2013

.beads: when passion breeds love.

Helping somebody for her big day is surely a great satisfaction.  Every single bead that I sew spells l.o.v.e.  I hope the love-beads will spread during the big day.  No, not for me.  But for her future husband. 

"Don't overdo ok. The veil is not yours." haha

Monday, October 7, 2013

.not really a bookworm. but the book is on sale.

Dear blog,

Today I woke up with a mission. After choosing what I wanted to wear (which took half an hour of standing in front of the wardrobe), I took a bath, get ready, grabbed my handbag and went to Popular book fair with a bestfriend. This was a second time.  Yesterday was too crowded that I couldn't breathe.  The queue was like a long train; I bet you can finish reading one book by the time you reach the counter.  Pfft.  But, no worries, I already hide the book I wanted.  'The Time-Travelling Fashionista'. Smile. You have no idea how beautiful the book is.  It smells good.  It looks promising.  The colour is vibrant and fresh.  The font is not too big, not too small.  It is hardcover!  So, I could hold it to sleep without worrying about the cover being torn while sleeping. 

So, there I was.  Eagerly searching for the book.  First round: couldn't find it.  Second round: still nothing. Third round: =( .  Fourth round:  the book was completely nowhere to be found!  Biting my nails, I tried to make myself believe that the book was still there.  But, failed.  Seriously, Kinsella's novels were still a mountain.  How come the people were more interested with 'The Time-Travelling Fashionista' than the Kinsella's???

But no worries bloggy, I bought a new book anyway.  Up to 90%! Who on earth is going to walk out without a plastic bag in their hands?? Who? Nobody! (Eh).  So, for the sake of holding a plastic bag,  I bought this book.  At home, after reading the first page, I couldn't stop to flip another page.  It is fantastically funny and witty.  So no regrets buying. Plus, it's only rm 5! Such a bargain. Kan? Smile.

Yours sincerely,

Thursday, October 3, 2013

which hospital should I go?

I dunno if we can call this a disease or it's just a bad habit. But seriously, I'm getting tired of it already.  May be, this is what karma really is.  I always mock my classmate. Instead of calling him by his name, I call him 'blur'.  And now, I think, I really am blur. =(

There's this one night, I went to a family wedding. They talked about the hall, the wedding theme, the gown and everything. So they asked
'Jadi tema apa ni ana?'
'Hari ni aku tema jubah.'
'Bukan. tema kawin bah.'
'Tema India kan dorang ni?'
And trust me, it took almost an hour for them to explain until I completely understood.

When I was at school last time, a teacher suddenly came to my table and asked me to mark the trial PMR papers.  I quickly took my red pen and went to her table. She said 'Seriously? I was just joking la. Don't be too na├»ve.' And by that naive, I take it as 'blur'.

A teacher asked me to come to school.  I thought she wanted me to continue teaching on that day.  So I tried to explain that the contract had finished. After some time, the teacher finally revealed 'Ada majlis untuk kau ba.'  My sister knew about this and said 'It's a surprise la. Kenapa blur betul kau ni.'

And recently, I accompanied a friend to jobs carnival. I can't believe that this one person whom I just met for 10 minutes called me 'blur'! I thought I was succeed to hide the clueless face.
'Kamu nampak blur la. Are you ok?'
'No. I just don't like business and to be honest I don't understand what you've just said.'
'Ok. It's alright. Biar saya bagi example. Apa nama anak?'
'Anak??emm..' (and mind you...I seriously figured out the names of my children..though I don't have one! pfft)
'Ok.camni bagi nama suami.'
'Saya belum kahwin.'
'Agak2 lah siapa nama suami?'
'Saya gurau-gurau ja la.haha. Kamu ni memang blur kan?' pfftttttt..It seemed like he's enjoying my 'blurriness'.

I don't know. Being 'blur' is not a good option.  It's either people will take advantage of you or people will regard you as annoying and boring.  Not a perfect combo =( 

.pic yang di snapkan untuk orang blur pun blur.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

.A-G's report: I think I'd have a heart attack.


Lots of  'ha??' 'what??' 'why so???' 'seriously??'

Reading the A-G's report is like reading Conan where you question yourself along the way trying to figure out the mystery.  

I tried to think straight and tried to find the logic behind the spending. It seems very hard.  Coz it's not logic.at.all. Like,

who bought 20 wall clocks for bloody RM 3,810 EACH??

and giving welfare assistance worth RM 120  per month for 145 DEAD PEOPLE between 2005-2012??

and spending RM 602,089 for UNUSED shoes and boots??

and RM 300 000 for a VISIT to Switzerland??

adui. People can get heart attack reading the unrealistic spending done by the 'smart people' up there.  There are a lot more. But these four are more than enough to make me breathless.

'We work so hard, day and night, just to earn RM 2k.  But these people, they can easily spend thousands and millions for their own good. Heartless!' A tweet from a middle class worker. *sedih.

We should give a standing ovation to the Jabatan Audit Negara for revealing the dirty secrets.

But the question now is, how many people will be fired because of mismanagement?
To quote from Harith Iskandar, 'NONE'

So, the cycle of mismanagement will repeat.again.soon.

Syukurlah minyak dan gula naik. It is for our own good. Tak baik membazir. Membazir kan amalan syaiton. Heh.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

.the sisters.

'Bila ko mo grow up ni dek?'


'Bila ko mo berenti minum milo tabur?'


I looked at their drinks. Lemon tea. Panas.

I looked at my drink. Milo Tabur. Sejuk. With mountains of milo on top. Yummylicious!

'Milo tabur sedap. Kakak nda pernah rasa. Kakak nda paham.'

Thursday, September 19, 2013

.coz everything inside me screams no no no.

being pushed again.

and I couldn't speak my mind

I hit myself for being stupid

Then I realise

I told him what I should tell

but the problems is

he doesn't understand

or simply he refused to listen

What should I do

Where should I run?



What the food!

People violate my rights. They give me two options.
A) Stay 
B) Stay

You got what I mean? Like, come on! What kind of options is that? Democracy?? Pfft.  There's no such thing in Malaysia I guess.
I'm tired.  They should discuss with me first.  They must!

That's why I keep on munching and eating.  Coz it's one of the ways to stop myself from cursing.

Oh, it's 9 pm.  I guess it's time to stop munching.  Coz I think I have to sleep.

p/s: sorry

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

.tolong doakan saya.

Mungkin pernah terlintas di fikiran untuk meminta orang mendoakan kita.  Terutama dalam saat-saat genting; peperiksaan, temuduga kerja/university, elaun tak masuk-masuk walaupun dah 10 bulan menunggu, atau ditinggalkan kekasih. eh.

Kadang mungkin rasa malu untuk minta orang doakan. Sebab, biasalah, manusia. Rasa ingin tahunya amat tinggi kadang-kadang.

'Boleh doakan aku?'
'Boleh. Doakan apa?'
'Supaya hati tenang.'
'Kenapa? Ko buat apa sampai tak tenang?'
'Mana boleh entah. Ko buat maksiat banyak betul ni.  Dosa apa lagi ko buat? Ko da cek doktor ada HIV atau tak?' (ehe.cerita melampau.)

Kadang dapat orang yang belum faham konsep doakan orang lain. Kenapa mau doakan dia? Doa aku pun nda termakbul lagi sibuk mau doakan orang lain. Ish.

Ada pula orang yang ego. Tak mau minta orang lain doakan. Rasa-rasanya agama aku lagi tinggi dari dia. Doa aku mungkin lagi di angkat. Tak pa. Biar aku doa sendiri.

Kadang ada orang yang belas kasihan melampaui batas. Hidup dia pun tak terurus. Kalau aku minta dia doakan aku, kesian la pula dia. Takut dia tak da masa mau doa.

Kadang mungkin kita terlepas pandang.  Meminta orang lain mendoakan kita adalah bonus untuk diri sendiri jugak.  Yalah.  Mungkin dosa kita yang banyak ni penghalang doa dimakbulkan.  Jadi, dalam ramai-ramai orang yang mendoakan tu mungkin ada la dalam empat lima orang yang soleh.  Doa orang yang baik ni akan diangkat oleh Allah. InsyaAllah.

Orang yang mendoakan orang lain pun dapat bonus jugak. Malaikat di sekelilingnya akan mengaminkan doa untuk dirinya juga.

'Ya Allah semoga Aminah cepat kawin.'
Malaikat cakap 'untuk kau jugak ramadana.' (eh?)

Apabila salah seorang mendoakan saudaranya (sesama Muslim) tanpa diketahui oleh yang didoakan, maka para malaikat berkata: Amin dan semoga engkau memperoleh pula sebagaimana yang engkau doakan itu.”
— HR Muslim dan Abu Daud —
p/s: Jadi..motifnya sekarang ni, tolong doakan si penulisblog. Malam ni ada saat-saat genting dan penting dalam keluarga. Tolong doakan semoga semuanya dipermudahkan Allah ya. Terima kasih. =)

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

.the next thing I should do.

I'm so screwed up.  First I lost the PBS thingy.  Then, I booked the wrong flight for my convo (which obviously means I have to pay more). After that, I failed to control the class.  Students gone wild.  I feel like teaching in the zoo (well, worst). 

I cannot think straight.  Nothing seems right to me. Everything! Even the baju I wore today seems so wrong.  I'm not comfortable in it.  The colour is so tacky I have no idea why I chose to wear it in the first place.  I wore the wrong heels. I drank the wrong drink. I chose pandan pudding instead of chocolate.  I ate expired biscuits which I found inside my drawer just because I cannot think straight.

I even end up washing dishes in the school toilet coz I need some space to think.  And it took me almost 15 minutes to wash just two plates and a jug.  I chanted 'one problem at a time' many times just to keep myself on track.  But..*sigh..failed. 

What's wrong with me? What IS wrong with me? 

I close my eyes for a moment; trying to stay composed.  I take a sip of coffee. Then another. Then another.

What should I do next? Sleep!

.Missing the costa moment. Remember the time we talked about everything while sipping cappuccino and u with ur forever ice vanilla? 

Saturday, August 31, 2013

.not a love story.

Feeling-less.  That's how I would describe my feeling at that very moment.  I have no idea why I choose to leave.  Two-day leave??  People would think I'm crazy. The colleagues think so.  The best friends either.  But, I choose to leave anyway.

10 minutes before landing, a homey-feeling creeps inside me.  I can't help smiling. I make my way out. No rush. The atmosphere is so serene. The weather is perfect.  I planned to rent a car and go straight to my favourite place, alone.  But, there.  Somebody is waiting. With a smile.  And that smile is contagious. Good news, I don't have to drive.

Lots of story come out, as if we know each other (too well) for 5 years.  No awkward moments.  It's like a pingpong game. I speak, you listen.  You speak, I listen. It's supposed to be a long and tiring journey. But, surprisingly, it's not.

We reach a place. It WAS a place full of hatred, once.  But, things are surprisingly ok. Having a companion who knows how to continue your sentence is bliss. I don't bother to look left and right.  I don't bother to think of the painful past.  I don't have to run away from the familiar faces. I don't have to be someone else. I just have to be...me.

Everything is near perfect. It's like a fairy tale. Everything is quite exactly what I want it to be.  The air is so friendly. I'm not being forced to do anything.  Yes. Friendship. That's how I describe the relationship. Coz we respect each other. We never step on the privacy zone until we are invited to do so. 


Friday, August 30, 2013

the puzzle will complete.soon.

"Don't beat yourself up for not knowing all the answers.  You don't always have to know who you are.  You don't have to have the big picture, or know where you're heading.  Sometimes it's enough just to know what you're going to do next.' -The Undomestic Goddess by Kinsella-

And so, what am I going to do next?

'Sleep' said the voice inside my head.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013


(tengok mata pun suda tau cantik) *credit google

Kadang kita tak faham. Kenapa orang bersongkok merokok? Walaupun ritmanya seragam (buat puisi pun sedap), tapi kombinasi rokok dan songkok tidak cantik.  Maka, mulalah orang menyalahkan songkok. Hairan.  Kenapa tak salahkan perokok?

Kadang kita tak faham.  Kenapa orang rancak bercerita itu dan ini di belakang hamba Allah yang tengah menunaikan solat.  Bukan mereka tak tahu manusia ni imannya senipis kulit bawang. 

'Weh Bedah, ko ada tengok heels kalerful di Vincci? Hari ni ada sales ok.'
'Ada! 70% ya ampunnnn. Gila aku tengok. Bila kita mo pegi?'

Jadinya, mulut membaca al-fatihah tetapi hati amat nakal. Sibuk fikir 'aku pun mesti pegi juga. mau beli heels 5 inci kaler kuning yang aku tengok ari tu.'

Hairan. Sebab masa orang tengah solat la idea mencurah-curah untuk cerita itu ini. (tunjuk diri sendiri).

Kadang  kita tak faham. Kenapa orang berniqab (a.k.a. purdah) ketawa kuat-kuat. Yang tak berniqab, ada saja yang ketawa lagi kuat maha dahsyat.  Tapi sebab dia berniqab, dia telah menjadi 'watak utama'. Hairan.  Orang menyalahkan niqabnya 'Percuma seja berniqab, tapi...'.  Kenapa tak salahkan perbuatannya? Kenapa mesti kesalahan diletakkan di bahu niqab?

Kadang kita tak faham. Kenapa kalau bercerita dengan anak murid, dorang selalu blur. Cerita tu lucu. Tapi pelajar tak ketawa.  Sebab mesej tak sampai? Atau pelajar yang penat, malas mau digest cerita?Hairan. Cikgu tak mahu mengaku kesalahan. Yang sebenarnya dia becerita nda best. Suara mendatar. Tak ada klimaks. Ok . Ini keluar tajuk. Frust coz students always don't get what I'm trying to say. Ish.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

.Beads and peace-s.

It's Sunday.  The only day off that I have this week.  I thought I shall use the time wisely.  That's why I slept a lot. Oho.

But no worries. I still have time to finish what I should finish. Which is this one:

Yeah. It was completely done during the 7th syawal. WAS. But these hands were itchy.  Couldn't stop to add this and that here and there.   

p/s: The more you force me to do something...the more I refuse to do it. I hope you understand.
p/s: (I know you won't understand.  Coz you don't know the existence of this blog. It's alright.)
p/s: Goodnite everyone.

p/s of the p/s: Too many p/s. Ish.

Friday, August 23, 2013

.Pemimpin masa hadapan.Eh.skema.

The question I gave to my students during Civic class is 'Apakah tanggungjawab rakyat untuk mengekalkan demokrasi di Malaysia?'

I received an unexpected answer like 'Undilah kerajaan dalam pilihan raya.'

So I asked him, 'Undi pembangkang tak boleh?'

He said  cannot. So I said 'Why not?'

'Sebab mesti undi kerajaan seja.'

'Selalu tengok berita di tv?'

He nodded and said 'Buletin Utama'.

I smiled.

Monday, August 19, 2013


I don't know which path I should take.
Left or right?
I wish I could choose 'or'

p/s: Sorry.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

.the best planner.

I put all the effort I could give to plan everything; to plan what I should say, how to construct the sentences and everything. 

But, yeah, Allah is indeed the best planner.  Within a day (less than a day to be exact), everything fall into place.  I didn't have to use the script I planned.  Though we haven't come to the decision yet, I am grateful that we managed to untangle some misunderstanding.

Decision has to be made, sooner or later. Whatever it is, I am sure, He knows better.

p/s: Let's pray for Egypt.

Monday, August 12, 2013


I praise Allah for everything; for every perfection, for every flaws, for every happiness, for every misery, for everything He had given me. 

I'm a woman, who always unsure about every single decision that I have to make.  But this time, I am pretty sure what I want and what I don't want.  Once again, I praise Allah the almighty.

Tonight is the night, where I should be honest to everyone and mostly to myself.  I shouldn't hurt anybody anymore. Enough is enough. Tonight, may Allah ease everything. Amin.

"Sesuatu yg dilakukan dengan niat kerana Allah swt, walaupun permulaannya pedih, pahit dan menyedihkan, in shaa Allah, pengakhirannya pasti manis dan indah.
Teguhkan hati, kuatkan jiwa. sabarkan diri
-quoted from a bestfriend-
thank you so much for being there.

.blame it on Kinsella.

'Rama tak baca ka artikel tu?'

'Tak.  Saya tak suka baca benda-benda serius macam tu.  Saya suka baca benda lain.'

'Tapi artikel pasal perempuan ni penting. Rama suka baca apa?'

'Sophie Kinsella' *bangga

'Huh?Siapa tu?'

'You don't know?? Sophie Kinsella? Shopaholic?  Confession of a shopaholic?' *I thought everyone knew who Sophie Kinsella is.


'Cerita tu best. Cerita pasal shopping.  Lucu gila. Best!' *sambil tengok-tengok novel Kinsella yang potential untuk di bagi pinjam.

'Haha.  Tapi Rama kena start baca benda-benda serius macam ni.' *sambil explain pasal artikel serius tu.


Seriously.I don't even understand a word. I should read serious article. May be I should start with something light, like emm emm... 

Glancing at the 'The Undomestic Goddes' by Kinsella (which I read for the third time), I think I should finish reading it first before moving on to the articles.


Friday, August 9, 2013

.Raya random.

So it's Syawal day 2 today.  And fact is, when we are over-excited of the event,sometimes we forget what day it is.  Like when people ask 'Hari apa ni ya?' then most of us tend to answer 'Hari raya ke-2'.  So may be that is one of the reasons why the muslims forgot to perform Friday prayer today (Husnuzon). 

I don't like stay up until midnight or pass midnight a day before raya.  But I had lots of things to do before raya.  So I end up slept at 3 am.  Just imagine, this woman, who always sleep at 10 pm without fail every night, has to sleep at 3??  The next morning, I woke up with the curtains and hooks and broom all over me.  I had lots of things to finish.  Pathetic.  A sister and her family came to my house that morning.  Thank God, I'm all ready to welcome the guests.  She said, 'Kakak tidur pukul 10 semalam.  Sebab malam raya tu la kita pompuan ni kena pakai mask siap-siap and tidur awal..so the next morning tak da la eye-bag..pimples beketul-ketul di dahi. Kan Ana? Pukul berapa tidur semalam?' While touching my pimples I said '3 pagi.' Sedih.

I love raya cookies.  Everytime beraya, I will try my best (lol) to taste each raya cookies in front of me.  But this raya, I cannot do the habit.  I got bad ulcer. It's very very painful until I can't eat properly.  My eyes got teary everytime I try to munch and swallow food coz it's too painful I can't bear it. So pathetic. In a friend's house, she said 'Rama kenapa mata berair?  Sedap betul kah kuih tu?  Jangan la bah  makan sampai terharu. Haha'. She literally laughed.  I don't blame her. She doesn't know how bad my ulcer is.

Talk about baju raya. Let's say congratulation to yours sincerely because her baju raya is still 'under renovation'. Until now. No worries mum said.  I have lots of baju kerja to wear.

Oh, wait. Just received a phone call from somebody. Here comes the drama. Nervous.

Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir dan Batin dari saya dan...ok itu nanti sambung. 

Saturday, August 3, 2013

.creepy crepe.eh.

Though crepe was so yesterday, but I did it anyway. Coz I love food. And sometimes the ones we cook by ourselves are worth it compared to the ones we buy (though sometimes the taste is not the same.oho)

Since I love kiwi, I decided to make kiwi crepe. 

I only use half of the kiwi to make 8 crepes. Slice it into small pieces.  Some people prefer the big slices. Up to you. =)
I used value pride whipping cream.  It's already sweet so to lessen the sweetness, I prefer to combine it with the sour kiwi. 


Hey, do you know that kiwi can function as antioxidant?  It helps to keep hair, skin, and teeth healthy. And it also can enhance our energy level. So, it's very good for those who are fasting.

(Nampak sangat copy paste google.huhu. Sebenarnya suka kiwi sebab dia cantek seja pun. ==')

Friday, August 2, 2013

.What happened happened.

This is a story about something in the past...
It was a very hot day.  5 days before raya if I'm not mistaken. 

There I was.  In the shopping mall.  Surrounded by beautiful-colourful baju raya and lagu raya as a background.  I was so excited that morning. Hoping. And kept on hoping for some miracle to happen. But. As expected. Nothing.  Nothing happened.

Desperate. I made a phone call.  A list of excuses given by the receiver. Being the clueless me, I tried to believe every single word.  I tried to smile.  But my vision was blur.  Coz I was trying to hold the tears.  I suddenly hated shopping.  I didn't have the guts to buy anything.

Now, after pondering about it again, I think those excuses are lame.  Yes.  I wasn't that smart back then.ehe.

Yes. Though the year was terribly terrible...I thank God coz He still gives me a chance to love shopping again to 'find' who I really am.

Monday, July 29, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (pelajar.macam vvip)

Insiden salah masuk kelas cukup sinonim dengan Teacher Rama sekarang.  Kalau orang tanya Teacher Rama mana satu, bolehlah jawab 'Ala, cikgu yang selalu salah masuk kelas tu'. Ish.

Tak apa. Itu bukan cerita utama.

Selepas insiden salah masuk kelas, terus sahaja menuju ke kelas yang sepatutnya; kelas tingkatan satu.  Pukul 4.09.  Seminit awal dari waktu sebenar.  Menanti dengan penuh sabar kerana mereka baru saja habis waktu rehat. Dan keburukan masuk kelas awal adalah, cuma 4 orang yang menanti di kelas.

4.15 petang, masih 4 orang.  Sabar. Puasa ni.  Jangan marah-marah.

4.20 petang, bilangan 4 menjadi 6 orang.  Sabar. Puasa ni.

4.25 petang,   satu persatu masuk. Perangai macam-macam.
Ada yang basah kuyup.  Bila di tanya, jawabnya
'Ada orang mandikan saya di tandas teacher'

Ada yang masuk tiba-tiba menangis macam drama melayu.
 'Teacheeer handphone saya di tangkap. Dalam tu ada gambar boyfriend saya.  Ada gambar exboyfriend saya. Ada gambar kakak tingkatan 2 yang rampas exboyfriend saya.  Dalam tu ada mesej boyfriend. Cemana ni teacheeer.'

Ada yang masuk memaki-maki. Bila di tegur, jawabnya
'Sorry bah teacher. Panas aku tadi.'

Ada yang masuk wangi semerbak.
 'Sorry teacher.  Minyak wangi tumpah. HAHA'

Ada juga yang tak masuk.  Bersidai di beranda.  Mengurat perempuan kelas sebelah.

Pada mulanya berusaha menahan sabar. Lepas semua yang berlaku, mula tanya diri sendiri 'Sabar tu apa? Nama orang? Makanan? Nama jalan?'

Syukur Allah kurniakan mata dan suara.  Mata dibesarkan, suara ditinggikan.  Oh, dan terima kasih juga kasut tumit tinggi.  Sesi melawan tentangan mata ternyata amat mudah.  Ketinggian yang luar biasa dapat menandingi pelajar gengster yang perasan tinggi kerana mereka terpaksa mendongak untuk bertentang mata.

Cuma tinggal sejam untuk sesi pembelajaran.  Kelas kembali normal.  Senyap, tenang dan menjawab soalan dengan baik. 

Bagus. Esok cabaran baru menanti.  Semoga terus tabah.

Those days, when baju kurung is not the only formal attire that we can wear. I miss those days.  Ouh, macam ni la muka memikirkan masalah budak-budak. 

Friday, July 26, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (students hati batu)

My form 1 students are so active.  Jumping here and there, running, screaming, singing, laughing, cursing...everything! I dunno what I should do.  I'm getting tired sometimes. Yesterday I almost cried in front of them.  They said they didn't understand, so I gave explaination, but they didn't wanna listen.  So, I threw whiteboard marker towards the most annoying student who always be the first to create chaos in class.  Then, he threw my marker in the bin.  Can you imagine? My one and only marker, in the BIN??

I dunno what I should do.  I scolded them in English, they kept quiet for 2 minutes, then said 'Apa teacher cakap? Tak paham.' Sedihnya hidupku.

Then, today, two boys fought in front of me while I was teaching.  I was so pissed off I scolded them.  This time I used Malay. But it turned out worst.  Coz I used 'Auntie' instead of 'teacher' "Auntie sudah suruh duduk kan tadi??!" All students looked at me. The two students tried so hard not to laugh.  I was like 'Ok, class continue with your work.' See...I was so pathetic. Just because I spent more time with my nephews, I bring the habit of calling myself 'auntie' to school.

I dunno what else to do. They enjoyed every punishment I gave. They know English is important. They just simply don't wanna learn.  They are smart.  But they choose to be the opposite.

.waiting for another vacation.

Sunday, July 21, 2013

.Bye bye yesterdays.

Today is Monday. Wake up! Wake up! No more holidays. No more awesome vacation.  No more staring at the ceiling, doing nothing. No more jumping aimlessly on the bed.  No more genuine laughter. No more singing 'ABC'.  No more yellow pump. No more colourful handbag.  No more everything.  Everything is just a dream. JUST.A.DREAM.  Now, wake up!

Putting a profesional smile.  And a pair of black heels. And a matured-boring handbag. And a stern face. and off I go.

Mr. Reality, welcome back.(ihatechu)

Friday, July 19, 2013

.a last minute decision.

Ticket.  Checked!
Blouse and dress.  Checked!
Cardigan.  Checked!
Sophie Kinsella.  Checked!
IC and cash.  Checked!
Cream and lotion.  Checked!
Cleanser and toner.  Checked!
Compact powder and lipbalm.  Checked!
Socks and shoes.  Checked!
Food.  Checked!
Body and soul. Half-checked!

Will be going somewhere after the tiring weekdays. Hopefully everything will fall into place once I come back. Hopefully. Hopefully.

p/s: I think I'm totally insane.  I can't believe I'm doing this.  Ok. Bai.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (colour-blocking)

I love to play the role as a devil avocate in my form 3 classes because I want them to speak and argue.  And thankfully, it works! Today I entered their new classroom.  They painted greeny-blue for the wall and yellowish-green for the ceiling.

So being the most annoying teacher I could be, I said the classroom is no more homey. The colour-combination is tacky.  Guess what the students said?
'Jadi teacher pun tacky la tu kan. Sebab combination colour teacher hari ni sama macam cat kelas kami.  Baju warna hijau-hijau biru, tudung warna hijau-hijau lumut.' 

Then, I looked at myself.  Checkmate!

'Ok kelas.  Mari kita teruskan pembelajaran.  Hari ni kita belajar pasal adat resam dan pantang larang pelbagai kaum'  (The best way to change the topic abruptly.hoho)

p/s: thinking of attaching the picture of my outfit, but nahh I don't want you to see how tacky I was.ehe 

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

things go wrong.sometimes.

What a joke. I've never been at anything as depressing as this, my whole entire life.  Ok. I'm exagerating things.  But, seriously, the situation at school today was quite depressing (for me).  I was asked to mingle with the teachers.  I did mingle!  It's just that I dunno how to say things.  Like when they talked about breastfeeding their babies, what do you expect me to say??  And when they talked about cooking for their husbands and how their husbands love their tomyam, and this kakak talked about her delicious noodles and her husband loves it.  I could only say 'Oh, so sweet!' I wanted to asked for recipe but the others still want to talk about their husbands.  It's quite rude to interfere right? Oh, come on. We live in Malaysia.  The teachers are nice.  I do like and respect them.  But it's just that we have this age gap. 

And another thing, I embarassed myself while talking with this young ustaz. We never talked before.  But, today I desperately wanted to ask about things.  So, since he's just around my age, I tried to make things casual by using 'aku' and 'kau'.

'H, kau ada pergi taklimat hari tu'
'Oh, ada.  Ustazah ada datang ka?'
'Ustazah? Ustazah mana satu?'
'Maksud saya ustazah la.'
'Aku? Eh, I mean saya? Oh, saya lambat datang.  Jadi..eh ok lah ustaz. Itu seja'
I quickly made myself disappear.

Because he didn't make things casual, so I feel awkward.  When I feel awkward, I refuse to talk about things anymore. I'm weird. I do admit.  Ish.  

Ok. That's why I asked for a one-day leave tomorrow from penyelia petang. Eh.

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (when the brain refused to work)

Today, my brain didn't cooperate with my tongue (or mouth?); lots of jumble up words...slip of the tongue la..confused with some vocab la..ish.

1. (Writing on the board):  River is very important in our daily life. 'Eh, is it 'life' or 'live'??' =='

2. 'Ok.kelas, sila buat pembetulan untuk sesiapa yang membuat kesilahan...i mean..kesalapan ish.'  

3. Wanted to explain about Unduk Ngadau during civic class.  End up wrote 'Roti cantik' instead of 'Ratu cantik'.  Ouch. Kantoi lapar. 

p/s: Oh today I was extra tired. Thinking too much perhaps. But thanks to Grakot and friends. They just made my day.

Sunday, July 14, 2013

.come.walk with me.

I went out to settle my kwsp.  The person in the counter looked at me head to toe.  I dunno what's on his mind.  And I didn't bother asking.  I'm very sure I wore something appropriate, so why bother?  Bad news was, there's a problem with my IC.  Oh, I forgot to tell, I haven't got time to change it since I was 14 (read:si rama pemalas).  Things settled within 10 minutes.  He said I would get it within a month since there's a problem with my IC.  Ish. Whatever it is, I'm impressed with the way they treat the customer with a smile (smiling is a rare thing nowadays).  Kudos kwsp tawau!

My bad habit is, I should buy something before heading home.  And that something could be anything; bread, pen, perfume, shoes and A4 paper pun boleh (==').  Today, I went to Guardian coz there's something called 'Sale' pasted on its glass door.  I thought of buying something very simple since I haven't got my salary yet.  So, I thought of tissue (==') since it is cheap and very useful and handy.  But, the cashier was soo nice and friendly I ended up buying 2 big stacks of tissues and 4  packets of cotton buds.  And I regretted buying those stuffs coz I have no idea why I grabbed so many tissues and..hello? cotton buds?? =='

p/s: I was in a very good mood today. Coz it's raining.  And I love walking in the rain.


Saturday, July 13, 2013

.when i'm annoyed, i go straight to bed.

Sangat bengang bila orang mempermainkan agama konon menegakkan sesuatu atas dasar Islam dan menggunakan istilah-istilah islamik hanya untuk kepentingan nafsu sendiri. Geram. Bila sesuatu yang tak senonoh keluar dari mulut seorang muslim yang dihormati. Malam ini, anda telah berjaya membuatkan saya aktif men-tweet. Tahniah!

p/s: baca doa. tarik selimut. tutup lampu. tidur.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

.of ramadana and ramadan.

"Puasa hari ni?"
"InshaAllah cikgu"
"Buka puasa di mana semalam?"
"Di rumah"
"Kenapa tak buka puasa di masjid?"
"Berbuka di sana senang dapat jodoh.Haha"

Seriously cikgu?Seriously?Seriously serious??? =.='

I gave him a 'haha' as a courtesy and quickly continued my work.

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (omai English)

'Good afternoon, class.  Sit down.  By the way, Happy fasting everyone!' (tried to be friendly)

Kriik..krikk..kriik.. (all eyes on me; awkward silent)

'Class, happy fasting!'


'I mean happy fasting..selamat berpuasa..??'

'Ooooo..cakap la ba puasa. Ish teacher ni. Fasting fasting..mana laa kami faham.'

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Ramadhan kareem everyone!

When I was a kid, Ramadhan is the best month for me.  Coz many people call out my name before sleep.  'Nawaitu saumagadin an'adai fardi syahri ramadhana hadzihissanati lillahita'ala.'

ish.ish. =.='

Ramadhan yang mulia, semoga sepanjang tahun kita berada dalam keadaan baik! Amin. (mari amin beramai-ramai)

Monday, July 8, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (what did you bring to school today, class?condom teacher!)

If during my school days, the things that teachers usually found during spot check were mirror, perfume, compact powder, lipstick and comic doraemon and conan..nowadays, those things were so yesterday.  Now, condom is the in-thing. Yes. Today, a teacher caught a girl who brought condom to school. 

I was like, why do you have to bring that to school?? The school should give it free to all the students. Ok. Kidding.  Then, it's like a bad day for the girl coz the teacher took her phone too.  And it contained 18sx texts. Funny coz every teacher who read the text automatically slapped the girl.   I can't tell anything coz I don't have the chance to read it.  The ustaz prevented me to read coz I'm not yet married. Then I said 'tapi student tu pun tak kahwin lagi ustaz'.  Checkmate terus. But still, I cannot read. It's alright.  Coz I don't know how to slap people.

But, it's still a shocking news for me. Some teachers asked 'Kau buat 3 jam????' Di situ?? Mana lagi? Ya Allahhhh!!' Though the message is not clear, but my heart was thumping very very fast. I can't help but thinking some bad things had happened to this girl. Still form 2...and she ruined her life because of boys?? sayangnya.  Pity her.  I hope she realised what she did was not the best for her.  There's still room for improvement.

p/s: I still think that only certain teachers (like counsellor/ discipine teacher)can read students' texts. Coz it involves privacy and dignity. Kesian budak tu if the whole staff room read her messages and spread it to everyone. Just saying.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

.Bila permata itu macam kaca.

Tidak tahu apa yang dimahukan oleh rakyat Mesir.  Usia pemerintahan Presiden Mohamed Morsi belum sampai setahun, namun beliau sudah digulingkan. Mengapa beliau tidak diberi peluang? Hairan. Sedih. Teringat apalah nasib rakyat Mesir sekarang. 

Perjuangan memang payah.  Apa lagi kalau yang diperjuangkan itu adalah kebenaran.  Puncak pendakian makin curam, ada saja halangan menanti di hadapan.  Sedangkan nabi Muhammad SAW pun harus melalui pelbagai cabaran dugaan yang maha hebat pada zaman jahiliyyah dulu sebelum terbentuknya masyarakat Islam yang bertamadun.  Nabi Yusuf juga pernah diduga, dibuang ke telaga oleh saudaranya, malah menjadi hamba sebelum baginda menjadi seorang pembesar Mesir yang hebat.  Dan mario pun harus melalui pelbagai halangan untuk mendapatkan puteri kesayangan.  Dan ramadana harus bekerja membanting tulang memerah otak untuk mendapatkan sepasang kasut idaman.Eh.

Kesimpulannya, ini adalah ujian Allah, dan semoga menjadi penguat semangat untuk umat Islam seluruhnya bersatu mendoakan kesejahteraan umat Islam di Mesir.

"Apakah manusia mengira bahawa mereka akan dibiarkan hanya dengan mengatakan 'Kami telah beriman,' dan mereka tidak diuji?"
-Al-Ankabut- 29:2
Semoga semuanya selamat.amin.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (those moments when you feel like hiding behind a curtain.ish!)

During English class
Teacher: Now we are going to talk about future plans. I want you to write 3 sentences of your plans for the next 10 years. 

A: So teacher we are 23 years old la tu kan?
Teacher: Yes!
B: Teacher can I write 'I will get a husband'?

The whole class laughed.

Teacher: B, of course you can.You are 23 by that time...so of course you can get married.

Suddenly I heard somebody whispered 'But teacher not married pun.  She's already 24.'

Teacher (being ignorant): Class..keep quiet.  Continue your work please!

While during sivik class....
Cikgu: Apakah yang dimaksudkan dengan melenggang perut.  Ada sesiapa boleh jawab?
A boy: Saya cigu! Melenggang tu maksudnya poco-poco.
Cikgu buat muka blur.
A boy: Alaa...ish.saya nyanyi ya..balenggang pata-pata...ngana pe goyang pica-pica
=.=' Seriously??

When I was trying to show how punctual I was..I stood in front of a class and waited until the teacher finished his last word. But surprisingly, he didn't even said 'thank you class.'
Ustaz: Cikgu tunggu apa ya?
Cikgu: Em..kelas saya di sini ustaz.
Ustaz: Eh, tapi saya 2 masa.
Cikgu: Eh betul saya ada dua masa terakhir dengan kelas 3E.
Ustaz: Tapi ini 2F cikgu. 3E di bawah.
Cikgu: Eh.sorry ustaz.
Ustaz senyumsenyum.ish.ish.ish.malu.malu.

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Hidup kelantan! Eh.

"Kau sokong siapa?"
"Kelantan!" jawab dgn yakin.haha.
"Ish.JDT la."
"Nda mau.sebab Kelantan suda 1.JDT masih 0." dua sahabat buat muka camni =.='

p/s: Actually kalau kelantan 0 pun aku tetap support. Sebab kelantan banyak makanan sedap n tudung cantikcantik. 

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

.there's something we shouldn't tell.

"Sebelum ni belajar mana?"
"Maktab kak."
"Course apa?"
"Oh. Berapa tahun?"
"Waa.Lamanya. 6 tahun duduk maktab sahaja??Kesian."

...senyum.tak perlu kata apa-apa...

Monday, June 24, 2013

.caring is sharing. (nawaitu itu no. satu)

"Andai ada sekelumit pun yang kita lakukan bukan kerana-Nya,
bagaimana pula nanti Allah hendak mengingati kita, membantu kita di akhirnya?" quoted from kisah sumayyah romli 

Ouch! Baru sekejap tadi pasang niat sahaja aku pergi kerja supaya dapat shopping banyak-banyak. Mari perbetulkan niat sebelum terlambat.

Saturday, June 22, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (banyak tanya)

So my morning starts with teaching those primary kiddos bahasa melayu.  Ehem! 

'Umpama mencurahkan air ke daun keladi tu apa?' Tiga murid bertanya.
'Itu adalah simpulan bahasa.  Maksudnya orang yg tak pandai terima nasihat.'

Aku lukis gambar orang dan gambar daun keladi sebab budak-budak lagi suka visual.

'Contohnya ini manusia...'

'Tidak.Itu Aiman! Itu Aiman!' jerit murid lelaki yang sangat aktif.

'Ok.ok. Ini Aiman. Aiman x suka dengar cakap ibu bapa.'

'Tapi Aiman dengar cakap mama!!'

'Ok.ok.ok. Let's say ini Aiman lain.'

'Aiman mana?Kawan kakak?' (Masa tuisyen perkataan cikgu tidak diguna pakai.hoho)

'Err..ya.  Jadi ibu bapa Aiman bagi nasihat, nasihat tu masuk telinga kiri keluar telinga kanan.  Macam air apabila dituang atas daun keladi..'

'Aiman kawan kakak tu jahat? Dia tak suka dengar cakap mama dia? Kenapa dia xdengar cakap?'

'Err..' (terus terbayang muka Aiman marjon 1. Tak sampai hati cakap dia jahat.) 'Aiman kawan kakak tu baik.  Macam ni la..tak kisahlah Aiman mana pun dia ni, yang penting kalau kita tak dengar nasihat, kita sama macam daun keladi.  Faham?'

Ingin menjelaskan benda simple ambil masa hampir 15 minit. Pingsan!

Thursday, June 20, 2013

.Teacher's diary. (Theme song: I knew you were trouble when you walk in)

Oh, I was at school just now. I don't know that I should read a lot of things and being as mature as I can to be a teacher. 

After saying hai,hello, selamat pagi, goodmorning, I was being introduced to a lot of products.  From Alken to slimming product, they explained everything.  The final question was asking me to be a member.  The next agenda was, explaining how much income I would get in a month if I join the group.  I was totally clueless.  Was I in the school or in a shopping mall?  But it's alright.  I was there, in front of them, physically but my mind wandered somewhere else.  And since I was a 'genius' I had embarassed myself;

'P-Sullivan-(i dont remember what. coz im not paying attention remember) tu adalah badan..em badan apa suda ni..badan..'
'badan berkecuali?' menjawab dengan yakin. and there's an awkward silent after that. malu.
'bukan dik.emm..tak pa. xpenting juga badan tu.yang penting blablablabla.'
and I swear I shouldn't say a word after that.
And then they brought me to stadium for the school's sports day.  Thank you heels and baju kurung,coz you just make me feel extra awkward.  I mean come on, who wears heels to the field during sports day?? Memalukan diri. But it's alright.
No. It's actually not alright. At first, some of the teachers didn't even look at me.  Didn't even say hi.  You know why?? Because they thought I was a student's sister. And some even asked me to carry all the dirty plates and mugs coz they thought I was working for the catering. Awesome first day ever! lol
So, the pengetua knows I was once studying in England.  And so the embarassing moment didn't stop there.
'You study di Britain kan.'
'So, who's the prime minister?'
'David er..something..' (Thank God I didn't blurt out Tchaikovsky.)
'Na..you tak tahu.  You tahu tak itu Russia punya prime minister kawin sama itu perempuan cantik yg itu olympian itu.'
(Seriously I have no idea.Shoot rama you shouldn't read lots of Sophie Kinsella.May be I should try reading something more serious next time) - Since I said 'MAY BE' so I don't think I should keep my word. Hoho.

Oh talking about how to mingle with teachers, I also shoud update myself with the latest sofa set, latest body shaping, and latest hijab. Ok noted!

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

.i have my shoulder for you to cry on (not literally).

The plot is almost the same
I'll pray for your happiness dear friend
Life is not cruel
She's not cruel
In fact nobody is cruel
It's just a cycle of life
Sometimes we up, sometimes we down
Now you are at the bottom, try to appreciate the beautiful scenery around you
coz there's nothing interesting to see in the airplane, that's why people opt for a journey by train.

naik train bole ambil gambar scenery (kena candid oleh sahabat adalah bonus). naik kapalterbang kalau tak ambil gambar peace kembung, mungkin ambil gambar awan, atau kalau desperate betul ambil gambar pramugara kacak dan kakak pramugari cantik.eh bosan.

Friday, June 14, 2013

.the Auntie's story.

So it's holiday.  A long long holiday after 6 years studying.  What a relief.  Since I'm at home, I'm learning the basic thing a woman should know which is how to handle kids. I have three nephews at home.  You know, boys are being boys.  Rough and tak beri peluang.  Lol. They jump here and there.  Fight every single hour.  Wrestling and tangling each other.  It's so 18 SG I couldn't stand their roughness.

So, one day, since I couldn't bare another WWE live in front of me, I gave them my teddy bears.  Secretly crossed my fingers and prayed they could play teddy bears peacefully like I did when I was a little girl.  All of them behaved well so I could munch my crisps and watch my favourite TV programme peacefully. 

I forgot that they are boys.
After 5 minutes.....
the teddies are no more teddies.  They punched the pink and brown teddy like they were a punching bag.  They kicked the white one and screamed 'Goal!!' when it successfully went under the table.  Lesson learnt! Giving teddies to the boys is a no-no.

There are times when I had a conversation with mum, it was hard to come to an end.  Why? because the kids always interfere.

'Mak ari tu jumpa satu orang tua ni...'
'Auntie, tak boleh cakap orang tua dengan nenek.'
'Orang tua mana?' Mum asked
'Nek, tak boleh cakap orang tua.'
'Ok.tak cakap suda'
'Pisangnya macam kena curi monyet'
'Auntie tak boleh cakap monyet'
'Mak susahnya macam ni.semua tak boleh' (tiba-tiba emo)

And even 'cacing' pun is a prohibited word. =='

Though kids are adorable, sometimes they make us lost our mind.  Like when I was watching TV and suddenly this actor said 'Jangan jadi bodoh!' Zakwan quickly said 'Auntie tak boleh cakap bodoh. Dia cakap bodoh.  Tak boleh.Tak boleh.' and cried.  I lost for words. Like, what should I do?  He wants me to scold the actor for saying bodoh.  But how?? Ya Tuhan. 

One thing I realised, kids don't like it when you scream and shout at them.  If we want them to do something, say it nicely.  Like being hypnotised, they will follow your instruction.

one of my heroes. This is obviously an introduction to his serangan otramen

Thursday, June 13, 2013

.I have a dream.A song to sing.

Me and mak are the biggest fan of MHI.  Every morning, while preparing breakfast together, we will let the TV3 to accompany our morning together (only until 8 coz the nephews begging to watch cartoons after that =.=').  Mak usually will comment on the issues discussed.  I, on the other hand, will comment on the hosts; the way they dress, the way they talk, their posture, their lexis and their jokes. 

In the afternoon, sometimes, we will watch WHI together.  Mak doesn't like some of the hosts. Coz they are too colourful and the hijab seems weird, she said.  I have to agree on that.  Mak sometimes give a one sentence comment like 'tudungnya pelik' and that's it.  On the other hand, her daughter will give more elaboration, the way they tangle their scarf, the way they talk, their posture, their lexis, and the way they cut somebody else's words for commercial break.

At night, we spend time together to watch berita. Mak usually will elaborate more on the news. I will usually nod.  And will comment on the top they wear, their gesture and the way they present the news. 

I didn't realise what I did until yesterday, mak said 'balik-balik bagi komen pasal pengacara.  Sebab mo mengganti dorang bah ni kan?'

'Ha.Mula suda senyum-senyum sendiri.Susun dulu piring.'

eh? hoho

coz we can chase our dream once we open our eyes (pic from deviantart.)

Saturday, June 1, 2013

.teacher's diary. (Maths teacher??)

This woman, who has difficulty to even count the balance of her money after buying ice cocoa+mini pearl yoyo, is going to teach maths today.

And surprisingly, after teaching decimals to those kiddos, they could easily grasped what I had taught them. (Oh, may be they are born genius.)

p/s: budakbudak sekarang tak count guna jari kaki dah.Ish.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

.bilik manis bilik.


Dear God,
Let this tidiness last longer.
Emm at least a month, may be? ehe.

(3rd day of spring cleaning.macam nda pandai siapsiap.mak cakap.)

Sunday, May 26, 2013

.the 'oooh' the 'arghhh' the 'issh' and the 'hehe'.

The moment I stepped my foot in KKIA terminal 2 until 11.30 pm yesterday, many silly things happened.

I was supposed to carry 20 kilos in my luggage. I was very confident that I only carried 18 kilos.  But too bad, I exceeded a kilo.  Air Asia is nerd. They follow the rules strictly (though they didn't do the same for their flight schedule).  I begged the staff to just let it go.  As expected, she said no.  So, I had to open the luggage in front of the many people. Here comes the invisible wardrobe.  I was too smart for placing the things that people shouldn't see on top of everything.  The moment I open the luggage, that thing fell from it.  The guy who stood nearby stared at me.  I felt like giving him a highfive in the face. No. I should slap myself first for being a 'genius'. Huh!

I got the hotseat while my nephew didn't.  So as a motherly aunt, I sent him to his seat at the back.  When I was about to go to my seat in front, everybody was queuing to go their seats at the back.  So I stood behind a steward to give way to other people. Funny thing was, many people (especially the elderly) asked me where they should sit instead of asking the steward.  I was excitedly showing their seats (copying what the stewardess always do) until he turned around and asked 'What are you doing standing behind me? Where is your seat?'

melihat ke luar tingkap mungkin lebih selesa.

In the aircraft, I was sitting beside a guy who was nice at first but became quite annoying towards the end.  He wore shades though it wasn't sunny.  At first, he seemed to be a macho-type of guy, asking serious questions with a business-like voice.  It was only for a few minutes when suddenly he talked about this and that, asked about these and those.  Chatterbox.  I listened to him exhaustedly until he asked 'Eh memang pendiam ka?' then I said 'Penat.' I tried to sleep, but I couldn't.  So I took the magazine.  When I was reading my favourite topic, he started a conversation again. This time, asking name. 'Rahmah.  Sedap nama kau tu.' So I said 'Memang sedap.Tapi itu bukan nama saya.' I closed the magazine and pretended sleeping so he would stopped talking.

In the evening, at home, mom and sis asked me to join them to a wedding.  I didn't even know the host.  She's my mom's friend. The wedding was beautiful; the bride, the pelamin, the songs, the food, the people, every single thing was wonderful.  So my sister and I decided to have a canon moment with the couples.  Since my mum was busy chit chatting with the bride's mom, we asked a favour from the bride's aunt.  She beforehand asked 'Kau ni kawan si ara (pengantin perempuan)?' 'Nda macik.' Jadi kau ni kawan si arom (pengantin lelaki)?'Bukan juga macik.hehe' 'Jadi kenapa kau mau begambar?' 'Errr' And then she left.  Ish. Macik ni.  Luckily, a photographer suddenly came and offer to take our picture. Hoho.